The Life Ledger

Fitness is a way of life.

It’s that time of year again - time for reflection on the year past and planning for improvements during the year ahead. Or month ahead, at least. Last year, I put together a list of resolutions I wanted to follow. This year, I’m making one resolution:

Control My Consumption

One resolution. One hefty, multi-faceted resolution. Particularly in the face of my weight - I’ve slipped some on the past couple of months as emotions have been high for one reason or another. Ironically, I’ve noticed as my weight creeps up, so does my desire to make impulse purchases. Fortunately, I’ve tasted the sweet success that comes with beating consumption, and that is tantalizing above any short-term satisfaction I get from buying a DVD or CD. Unfortunately, impulse eating is harder to combat.

Of course, I also recognize “consumption” means much more than what I buy or what I eat, and as I’m battling my return to consumption, I’m finding other inter-related habits forming as well. So, for the next year, here’s the consumption I will strive to control:

• Drink more water.
  I’ve noticed I’m drinking much less water recently - where I used to drink 64oz a day, I’m now lucky if I drink two glasses. I used to enjoy drinking water - I was less hungry, my moods were more balanced, my sleep cycle was much more regular, and my productivity didn’t suffer swings as coffee buzzes waxed and waned. It’s all a matter of availability - I will add to my morning ritual filling a Nalgene bottle with water and keeping it at my desk.
• Control portion sizes.
  I’ve noticed my appetite has grown again - where once I portioned food according to calorie content, I am again worrying if a plate full of food will be enough to quell my hunger. It is time to retrain my appetite, to control my portion size instead of letting my appetite dictate my intake - particularly since my “hunger” is often emotion-based, not a true indication of my body’s need for fuel. Going forward, I will once again treat my body as a bank, allowing a daily caloric intake and controlling food choice and portion size accordingly.
• Exercise daily.
  This is pretty obvious. I will not be one of those statistic exercisers that fill the gym from the months of Jan to March. I’ll be the one breathing the sigh of relief as my exercise equipment of choice becomes available more often. It’s time to re-establish exercise as a priority when planning my day, and allocate time accordingly.
• Exercise fiscal responsibility.
  This is where I fared the best over the last year. Even with my recent slipping, I’ve resisted the returning desires for impulse purchases. Going forward, I’m ready to take the next steps - where before I simply remained aware of my account balances monthly, I will now create a debt reduction plan and monthly budget. Last year, I worked on not overspending; this year, I’ll work on saving.
• Exercise my brain.
  I used to be a voracious reader; until recently, I am embarrassed to admit my reading is almost completely relegated to magazines and blogs. Tonight, I finished a trilogy and am halfway through a Sudoku book - and feel once again exhilaration as I flex mental muscles. I will continue to make time to read and work logic problems.
• Control my information intake.
  My morning ritual begins at 5:30am, when I pour a cup of coffee and sift through RSS feeds and email while cycling on a stationary bike. Lately, I often suffer frustration as I have an overwhelming amount of information to sift through and not nearly enough time to do so. In Bloglines, I have 506 feeds - way too many! Even in an attempt to winnow the list down to a more manageable size by creating a “Daily” playlist comprised only of those feeds I think are important to read on a daily basis, I’m still left with 193 feeds. As I’m driven, almost compelled, to completely review the list, I realize my information owns me - by labeling an insurmountable amount of information as “important,” I have surrendered control, and my productivity suffers. Going forward, I will make notes of which feeds I actually find daily value in, and drop the rest. Information should uplift, not bankrupt.
• Consume peace, not anger.
  Emotions are like a self-hosted banquet where I serve as both host and guest, both choosing and consuming the fare. When I choose an angry emotional reaction to someone cutting me off in traffic, I consume my own anger, which feeds and inspires further anger and seething. Unintentionally, soon I’m not only consuming my own bitter angst, I’m also serving it to others around me, spreading my bad mood. In the new year, I will be more mindful of my emotional reactions, choosing the most peaceful reaction possible in every situation.

Control consumption. This year, my resolution will be my motto.

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New Year’s Resolutions are like spam, dreams of financial gain or weight loss without form to re-enforce their promises.

In writing a previous post I had the above epiphany. It was to be my closure, but it struck a chord. It is simple, memorable, but with more than a grain of truth. So after some discussion with Cris, decided to give it a story of its own.

So why am I having a hard time writing? Both Spam and New Years Resolutions are common enough in our culture. Maybe it’s because no one really takes either one very seriously. The average person gets 7 or more pieces of spam a day. And experience shows how few people actually believe them, all being sent unread to the digital trash. Can the same not be said for New Year’s Resolutions? Look at how long most people keep them. I was making my first resolutions at age 10, only to be broken within 3 months.

There are similarities though in how they play with our psyches. Both encourage the impulse for a quick fix, but usually only end up helping someone else. How healthy do you think your retirement fund is going to be if you chase after “pump and dump” stocks? Or are you expecting that inheritance from a mysterious prince? It’s easy enough to ride that horse to death, so I’ll stop.

So why do we then lie to ourselves about future changes in actions, when we refuse to maintain the needed willpower to follow through? Maybe my google-fu is weak but I couldn’t find any research on how long people take to decide on their resolutions. But in the beginning of December, co-workers usually starting asking each other “what are your resolutions for next year”? Most of the time, people get that look of concentration, do a cursory self evaluation, and choose the least painful thing to promise. So few put actual thought into these “life changes”, requesting more time for serious contemplation.

This is why Cris and I both advocate that people should instead plan out their goals, approaching them as an integral part of life. Usually the same whims that lead you towards fitness are those that can cause you to stumble.

The Simple Dollar led me to a great post this morning at An English Major’s Money; this paragraph in particular resonated with the paradigm shift I’m going through:

I guess the point here is that the way you spend is determined by the way you live and the way you think. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately: money is so much more than math. It’s about personality, and conscience, and comfort, and childhood, and habit, and belief, and culture.

I think that’s spot-on.  I recently came to the conclusion that my spending habits and eating habits were inter-related, and as I made lifestyle changes that slimmed my waistline, my wallet grew as well.  I decided that eating and spending are both under the umbrella of “consuming”, and realized my lifestyle dicates my consumption and my thoughts dicate my lifestyle.

Ok, so the words are nice, but how does it apply to my life?  When I look back at how I set weight-loss goals, I realize I have followed a pattern that illustrates how some small changes I made resulted in a tremendous lifestyle shift.  Some of the early small changes were:

I wanted to change.  The catalyst for me was cholesterol - my doctor wanted to put me on cholesterol medication, and I decided I wasn’t that person.  I emotionally invested myself in the lifestyle change I wanted to make - I did not want to be the dad that couldn’t keep up with his child’s first bike experience.  I did not want to be the fat man at Disney that couldn’t fit into the Mount Everest ride.

I redefined how I thought about my self.  The trick here was to think positively about the change I would implement, not negatively about the person I was at the time.  I am the choices I make, not the way the world makes me - by redefining my “self” as a choice to live a healthy lifestyle, I overcame being overwhelmed or depressed about my weight and appearance.

I kept a positive attitude.  I consciously sought positive changes and celebrated them - less fat in high-profile areas like my chin and armpits; stopped snoring; more endurance; less appetite.  I found that just by having a positive attitude, I actually starting enjoying those things that I resisted before, like broccoli and exercise.  Now, not only is it part of a routine, I do really enjoy riding the bike, eating raw veggies and drinking 3 quarts of water a day.

I studied my own reactions.  Impulse buying, impulse eating - it’s the same thing, a mindless reaction to an outside stimulus (Dave calls it his unconscious acts).  I began practicing a point of awareness - consciously recognized my choices when otherwise I would mindlessly react.  Walking through the DVD section at Best Buy, where normally I would almost subconsciously reach out and grab any movie I had an emotional attachment to and purchase it, I now consciously stop, pick it up, look at it, make a choice on purchase and usually put it back.  Trent at The Simple Dollar calls it his ten second rule, and I like that description (although sometimes it takes a little longer than ten seconds, like that durn scale I want) - take ten seconds to give yourself a chance to consciously make a choice rather than subconsciously reacting.

For me, lifestyle change started with the way I think.  I needed to think positively, consciously and diligently.  Thinking about the food I put in my mouth every time gives me time to evaluate what I’m eating, how much I’m eating, how fast I’m eating, and those ten-second evaluations become lifestyle habit changes.  Thinking about what I purchase every time I buy something gives me time to evaluate what I’m purchasing, and those ten-second evaluations become lifestyle habit changes.

No matter what I’m consuming, be it food, retail purchases, opinions, mass-media TV, or a spiritual leader’s statements, I now approach it from a place of power - I evaluate my responses and choose instead of react.

I hate the first of the year.

Okay, that’s a bit harsh.

What I hate is how many people set themselves up for failure. Sometime after the holiday ham and before the midnight bubbly, the average American takes this long look inward. Maybe it’s that change in the last digit of your checkbook. Or the lengthening days that hint at the coming promise of spring. And just as the moon pulls at the sea, we make those same resolutions as last year only to be foiled a few months down the road. And we are used to the cycle. We see those same articles dusted off : Most common resolution, First to go, How long can you last? ….. Sorry, that last sounds abit like spam.

And in droves We the People stimulate the economy: our gym memberships, exercise equipment, fad diets, IRA contributions, increased savings at the Banks. Companies love that financial shot in the arm. They know that very few people keep their resolutions because…

Exercise:
Off to the gym we go, shiny new gear in the trunk. Wait, everyone else seems to have gotten the same deal! Packed parking lots, queues for machines, and not enough clean towels just made my 30 minutes at lunch become 2 hours! After work is even worse. Can’t go outdoors because I’m above the 39th parallel. Anyways, I don’t remember being this sore last year when I started up.

Savings:
It’s time to improve my retirement savings plan. 10% into the 401k, plus 100 a month into an IRA. Hmmmm….. The bills from Christmas just came in. I know, I’ll start next month. But then that’s Valentine’s Day. Oh and taxes, can’t forget Uncle Sam. I’ll try to remember to start this up again in May.

Diet:
Oy, after all that holiday food I need to lose some weight. Time to diet, I’ll try those pills I saw on TV. Shoot, George brought in left over Christmas cookies. Maybe after the Superbowl because Sam always makes the best wings. One or two chocolate hearts aren’t going to hurt. What the hell?! Why aren’t I losing weight!?

So your motivation drops, and with it the focus of your resolutions. With no visible forward progress, you got frustrated and decided to try again in another year. So I say to you, be contrarian in the timing of your resolution. Pick a time that is away from birthdays and holidays. It could lead to a greater chance of keeping it.

This weekend, I had a lot of “stuff” to do and one day to do it in.  Sort through my chaotic collection of music and photos, write a couple of blog entries, do some research on a couple of larger articles, catch up on my RSS feeds, sort through all the saved items in my Bloglines account and make clips or bookmarks out of them, learn more about blogging in general, work on my Wordpress template, etc.  I didn’t get very far on my list, because I realized something - these to-do items were all just filler stuff.  There were many more important things to do on my weekend, like take the dog for a walk with my wife - it might not be on my to-do list, but it’s more important and healthier than the “stuff” I did list.  Walking the dog is quality time with my wife, where we get a chance to talk about life and share an experience, laugh together - all important to me, and which I love and need; it gets me outdoors in the sun, which is important to my health; and it’s a physical activity.

So, at the end of the day, when I reviewed my important “stuff” that I wanted to accomplish, I realized something - I follow an unhealthy approach to establishing to-do lists.  In fact, I set myself up for failure.  I create to-do lists by reviewing projects that need accomplished; I even go so far as to list out small steps for larger projects.  What I don’t do is use an additional filter besides importance of project - importance of fitness.  I should make sure I schedule time for exercise, for family, for cleaning and sorting my office - these are all important to my fitness, but don’t get entries on my daily schedule.

Going forward, it’s time to schedule time for me.